Reflections of an Aging Hipster

So, I’m 54 years old.  I know it doesn’t seem like I’m that old.  At least it doesn’t to me.  I mean, for the most part, I dress in black t-shirts and shorts, listen to music that is too loud, and post on Facebook too much.  But, I am 54 and prone to bouts of reflection.  That is why this blog entry is about that; reflection on being beyond mid-life and moving forward with a positive attitude.

I’ve always been an optimist.  I try to see the good in what lies ahead of me.  I realize that there are negative forces out there, but I can’t see the need to expend energy to dwell on them (other than to understand the source and avoid the trap).  I think that there can be beauty in everything, but then again some would say that I’m overly sentimental.

I was listening to a song on a new album I just purchased (linked here) and it covers the age old idea of building a time machine and going back in your past to change your future.  This is an interesting thought exercise and believe me, when time machine technology becomes available, I’m running back to a couple of places to make sure that I sufficiently mess up my future.

What?  If you go back to more than one point in your past, won’t only the furthest point have any lasting effect?  Possibly, but I like to think of time as a bowl of spaghetti, rather than a single ribbon.  There are so many points in my past where decisions pushed me one way, when multiple other ways were available.  Do those other paths exist in alternate realities?  I would love to think so.  I would also love to think that all of those paths tend to lead in the same general direction; a path toward happiness.

So, going back, I might realize that what I perceived as ignorance and poor self-image was just fear.  I might have spoken more to that amazing individual I met at a party in the early 90s.  I might have realized that some of the people I lost contact with were really people that I needed in my life all along.  I might have been able to influence my parents decisions on various issues (primarily seeing the value in mutual funds, but I digress).  All of these trips to the past would create a slightly different future, but in the end, would I be in a fundamentally different place?  I hope not.

Things seem to work out if you let them.  The important people in your life end up being there.  At least that’s how I see it.  I’m 54 years old, but I think young.  I have old man ailments.  I’m overweight, and I could get down on myself and let the poor self-image of the past overwhelm me.  But, I have hope.  I know that the future will be positive.  I know that the people in my life that I call friend are wonderful and important to me.  I believe that in that variety of futures in this multiverse, those same friends will influence my life.

So, what does this all mean?  It means that as I reflect, I feel happy and positive.  I hope my family and friends know how much I value and love them.  Bah, call this the ramblings of a middle aged hipster and just leave me be on this end of summer morning.  I’ll soon be back to inappropriate jokes, music videos that harken back too much to the 70s, and posting on Facebook like a 20-something girl.